i carry your heart with me

by e.e. cummings

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it (anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

Keeping Watch

"Keeping Watch" by Hafiz

In the morning
When I began to wake,
It happened again -

That feeling
That You, Beloved,
Had stood over me all night
Keeping watch,

That feeling
That as soon as I began to stir

You put Your lips on my forehead
And lit a Holy Lamp
Inside my heart.

i am the green

the world outside,
the earth,
the atmosphere -
looks melancholy
today.

she is clothed
in gray,
the color
of ash.

i walked
under
the earth's teardrops
this evening.

i wonder,
is she mourning?
and if so,
what is she grieving?

i tell the earth,
i see you.
i'm here
to listen.
i'm here
to receive you.

and -

i notice
surely
and
easily
how
the cloudy light
and
the misty breath
of these
recent days
illuminates
and
animates
the green,
the life,
what is
growing
as
each
tear
drops.

i find myself -

i know -

these days
after
so
many
days...

i -

i
am
the
green.

"In today's sharp sparkle..."

Obama 2009 Inaugural Poem: "Praise Song for the Day" by Elizabeth Alexander



Praise song for the day.

Each day we go about our business, walking past each other, catching each others’ eyes or not, about to speak or speaking. All about us is noise. All about us is noise and bramble, thorn and din, each one of our ancestors on our tongues. Someone is stitching up a hem, darning a hole in a uniform, patching a tire, repairing the things in need of repair.

Someone is trying to make music somewhere with a pair of wooden spoons on an oil drum with cello, boom box, harmonica, voice.

A woman and her son wait for the bus.

A farmer considers the changing sky; A teacher says, “Take out your pencils. Begin.”

We encounter each other in words, Words spiny or smooth, whispered or declaimed; Words to consider, reconsider.

We cross dirt roads and highways that mark the will of someone and then others who said, “I need to see what’s on the other side; I know there’s something better down the road.”

We need to find a place where we are safe; We walk into that which we cannot yet see.

Say it plain, that many have died for this day. Sing the names of the dead who brought us here, who laid the train tracks, raised the bridges, picked the cotton and the lettuce, built brick by brick the glittering edifices they would then keep clean and work inside of.

Praise song for struggle; praise song for the day. Praise song for every hand-lettered sign; The figuring it out at kitchen tables.

Some live by “Love thy neighbor as thy self.”

Others by "first do no harm," or "take no more than you need."

What if the mightiest word is love, love beyond marital, filial, national. Love that casts a widening pool of light. Love with no need to preempt grievance.

In today’s sharp sparkle, this winter air, anything can be made, any sentence begun.

On the brink, on the brim, on the cusp -- praise song for walking forward in that light.

the lines around a heart

do you see the heart in the image above?

the lines
around a heart
can be drawn
and
joined
by
cracks,
formed
by
cracks.
true,
yes?

this beauty revealed itself to me while i walked to the gym in the quiet, early morning two sundays ago.

what beauty is revealing itself to you today?

*
today,
like so many,
i am thinking about
Martin Luther King, Jr.
his words.
his courage
in sharing
his dream.
declaring
his dream.
the necessity
of
giving voice
to
his dream,
this dream,
my dream,
our dream.

giving birth,
certainly,
to this:
life.

the one
we are
bit
by
hopeful
and
precious
bit
waking to
and
co-creating
and
living.

what dream are you declaring and sharing?
what dream are you waking to? co-creating? living?

*
"Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it."
-Martin Luther King, Jr.

*
i wish us the vision to see the cracks forming a perfect whole.
i wish us the courage to dream, wake, speak, create and live.
i wish us love's release, harmony and illumination.

this full moon night

i spent hours chanting
(Kirtan)
and
communing with others
this late afternoon
into the evening.

after our sacred singing
we shared a potluck
in a perfectly lit
and
warmed room.

lentils.
sweet potatoes.
edamame.
chocolate cake.

i stood by the window
and
looked out.
delighting in
the twinkle lights
covering trees,
softly
illuminating
the
(finally)
falling
snow.

i spent time
conversing
with
a soul*friend's partner.
grateful to have
deepened
our connection
through created
and
shared
open*ness,
warmth
and
safety.

inspired
by his
truth*fullness.

we saw
one
another
tonight.

his face,
luminous
and
wide,
a full moon
in a clear sky.

and,
i
was
bRAVe.

i did not
turn away
from his
beauty;
that is,
i did not
turn away
from my
beauty.

this morning

i woke after a rest-full night sleep.
a night of
uninterrupted,
unbroken
sleep.

grateful.

as i turned toward my big window
i hoped to see
through
this lens
snow
falling.

expectant.

my hope for snow was wider than usual, i realized.
this greater hope
due to the cancellation of today's special day of retreat.
canceled because of this talk of snow.
this snow talk.

no snow falling.
had it snowed and stopped?
or,
paused?

i scanned the rooftops first.
no snow there.
snow on the ground?
no.

will it snow?
i don't know.

there may be rain.

still,
this morning
i am moving in the quiet,
soft
and
graceful ways
snow
invites me,
calls me.

crawling back into bed for a bit longer.
turning up the heat.
rolling out my yoga mat.
raising my arms.
welcoming this day
as it
is,
as it
unfolds.

yes.

retreating once more to my bed.
this time
sitting
cross legged
facing the window
and
reading aloud
the beginning pages
(and pages)
of
John O'Donohue's book,
To Bless the Space Between Us.

these are
my morning prayers.

from "Matins":

"In the name of Silence
Womb of the Word,
In the name of Stillness
Home of Belonging,
In the name of the Solitude
Of the Soul and the Earth.

I arise today."

from "A Morning Offering":

"May I have the courage today
To live the life that I would love,
To postpone my dream no longer
But do at last what I came here for
And waste my heart on fear no more."

from "For A New Beginning"
[yasmine, i thought of you & your word, unfurl, when i read these words...]:

"Though your destination is not year clear
You can trust the promise of this opening;
Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning
That is at one with your life's desire."

wishing radiant you* a gently courageous day...

**
a reminder: leave a comment here to enter to win a give*away, an extra*special gem parcel.

winter solstice: Sacred Life Sunday

some treasures for this winter solstice, this :

*Jen Lee's Solstice: Stories of Light in the Dark. find out more about downloading it via CD Baby (for $6!) here. last night before sleep i turned out the lights, sat in the dark & listened to this beauty, this sweet & wise & spoken lullaby. thank you, Jen Lee.

*"To Know the Dark" by Wendell Berry; discovered here.

To go in the dark with a light is to know the light.
To know the dark, go dark. Go without sight,
and find that the dark, too, blooms and sings,
and is traveled by dark feet and dark wings.

*words by Rebecca Parker, President of Starr King School for the Ministry:

"Perhaps for a moment the typewriters will stop clicking,
the wheels stop rolling and the computers desist from computing,
and a hush will fall over the city.
For in an instant, in the stillness, the chiming of celestial spheres will be heard, as earth hangs poised in the crystalline darkness,
and then gracefully tilts.

Let there be a season when holiness is heard, and the splendor of living is revealed. Stunned to silence by beauty we remember who we are and why we are here. There are inexplicable mysteries.

We are not alone. In the universe there moves a Wild One whose gestures alter earth's axis toward love. In the immense darkness everything spins with joy.

The cosmos unfolds us. We are caught in a web of stars, cradled in a swaying embrace, rocked by the holy night, babes of the universe.

Let this be the time we wake to life, as spring wakes,
In the moment of winter solstice."

*in the hushed stillness of this winter solstice i wish you this remembering: you are not alone. every*thing tilts toward love and joy. you are held, cradled, rocked. you are a precious babe of the universe.

just in case...

just in case you need reminding, as i do...

"Keeping Watch" by Hafiz

In the morning
When I began to wake,
It happened again-

That feeling
That You, Beloved,
Had stood over me all night
Keeping watch,

That feeling
That as soon as I began to stir

You put Your lips on my forehead
And lit a Holy Lamp
Inside my heart.

tuesday night treasures

• i heart holiday music sung by Johnny Mathis. thank you Liz Elayne for sharing this link.
• do you know Susan Tuttle? she is magical. have a look. and, her new book has just been released! hip hip hooray! oh wait, there's more! she's having a contest to give away a copy of her book. more information here. like i said, magical.
• moved by this post by Shari and her reference to "a place inside..."
• craving silence.

"Silence" by Hafiz

A day of Silence
Can be a pilgrimage in itself.

A day of Silence
Can help you listen
To the Soul play
Its marvelous lute and drum.

Is not most talking
A crazed defense of a crumbling fort?

I thought we came here
To surrender in Silence,

To yield to Light and Happiness,

To Dance within
In celebration of Love's Victory!

marinating in the bliss

as i write this, with the intention to post it in the early a.m., i am marinating in the bliss of being in the presence of the great, wise Mary Oliver. i wrote to a friend, "with each spoken word it felt as if she was offering me/us a communion wafer." it was a holy and sweet time. no doubt, i will wake in the morning of this thanks*giving eve, also my big bro's 35th birth*day, marinating still.

i am in touch with my deepest cravings (for): quiet prayer, gentle partnership, fresh air communion, the freedom of forgiveness and still*full presence.

"What i want to say is that the past is the past and the present is what [my] life is and [I am] capable of choosing what that will be [me, a] darling citizen. So [I will] come to the pond, or the river of [my] imagination, or the harbor of [my] longing, and put [my] lips to the world. And live [my] life."
-from "Mornings at Blackwater" by Mary Oliver

dear mother earth & more: Sacred Life Sunday

elements of my :

*i discovered this prayer in the prayer book, LIFE PRAYERS FROM AROUND THE WORLD, edited by Elizabeth Roberts & Elias Amidon. this is my prayer for today, for all my days.

Please, dear mother Earth,
Help me to stand firm on my own two feet
Drawing on the solid earth below me
Help me to know the constancy of your strength
the power that is you, oh dear mother earth
Help me to walk with the blood of rivers in my veins
and the dark crumbling soil of earth in my flesh
Let my muscles be strong as the tree trunks
that rise up out of your belly
To dance in the sky
and sing praises to the life all around
Beating, pulsing, rich and full
with your sweet sure energy.
Oh dear mother earth,
Live in this body today.
Sing loudly in every breath I take
Stretch wildly and flow freely
with all the directions I move
and come home with me,
come home to my belly
live deep in my soul
oh mother earth, SING!
-Stephanie Kaza

*a 1 hour 36 minutes & 18 seconds reconnecting phone conversation with a beloved sister who lives in laramie, wyoming. hearing that she is well and happy. this is a victory! a few years ago she proclaimed with humor (one of her magnificent gifts) and truth*fully that her life resembled a Lifetime movie. i am blessed with an abundance of soul*sisters. lucky, lucky, lucky me.

*remembering the delicious*ness of last night's dinner & nourishing conversation with another soul*sister. after dinner, a night of heart*moving sacred singing/chanting/Kirtan.

*in less than 2 hours i will embrace a sweet soul from portland, maine & her co-worker, who are in my city on business. we will celebrate thanks*giving & dine together!

*baking a family favorite cookie: coconut thumbprint cookies with raspberry preserves.

*wearing bella's pink sweater and a piece of jewelry (purchased in honor of my love for bella and her love for me) made by the divine Thea Coughlin.

*looking forward to this week: lunch with a friend at a favorite spot on monday afternoon; a kundalini yoga class on monday night; a tuesday afternoon reunion with a marvelous being, who i have not seen in over 9 years; going to see & listen to the great poet Mary Oliver on tuesday night; big bro's birthday on wednesday; a vinyasa yoga class on wednesday morning & dedicating this practice to my big bro; being at my parents' home with my bro & our fam's angel dog on wednesday afternoon - sunday; and, enjoying good food, fresh air, movies, games and all kinds of cozy*ness.

now is the time

"Now is the time,
To climb up the mountain
And reason against habit,
Now is the time...

Now is the time
To commence the litany of hope,
Now is the time..."

-Mzwakhe Mbuli

this is how i love

a couple of weeks ago i received an e-mail from a soul*sister across the country. she wrote, "I heard this poem on my way home on NPR....It reminded me of your appreciation for the small things...."

yes, this is what my life's calling is: seeing, appreciating, celebrating & sharing the small, daily, ordinary, miraculous, alive things. this is how i love. this is how i pray & worship.

The Patience of Ordinary Things
by Pat Schneider

It is a kind of love, is it not?
How the cup holds the tea,
How the chair stands sturdy and foursquare,
How the floor receives the bottoms of shoes
Or toes. How soles of feet know
Where they're supposed to be.
I've been thinking about the patience
Of ordinary things, how clothes
Wait respectfully in closets
And soap dries quietly in the dish,
And towels drink the wet
From the skin of the back.
And the lovely repetition of stairs.
And what is more generous than a window?

from Another River: New and Selected Poems.

"Spirits": a poem

"Spirits" by Birago Diop (a Senegalese poet, storyteller, veterinarian & diplomat)

Listen to Things
More often than Beings,
Hear the voice of fire,
Hear the voice of water.
Listen in the wind,
To the sighs of the bush;
This is the ancestors breathing.

Those who are dead are not ever gone;
They are in the darkness that grows lighter
And in the darkness that grows darker.
The dead are not down in the earth;
They are in the trembling of the trees
In the groaning of the woods,
In the water that runs,
In the water that sleeps,
They are in the hut, they are in the crowd:
The dead are not dead.

Listen to Things
More often than Beings,
Hear the voice of fire,
Hear the voice of water.
Listen in the wind,
To the bush that is sighing:
This is the breathing of ancestors,
Who have not gone away
Who are not under earth
Who are not really dead.

Those who are dead are not ever gone;
They are in a woman's breast,
In the wailing of a child,
And the burning of a log,
In the moaning rock,
In the weeping grasses,
In the forest and the home.
The dead are not dead.

Listen more often
To Things than to Beings,
Hear the voice of fire,
Hear the voice of water.
Listen in the wind to
The bush that is sobbing:
This is the ancestors breathing.

Each day they renew ancient bonds,
Ancient bonds that hold fast
Binding our lot to their law,
To the will of the spirits stronger than we
To the spell of our dead who are not really dead,
Whose covenant binds us to life,
Whose authority binds to their will,
The will of the spirits that stir
In the bed of the river, on the banks of the river
The breathing of spirits
Who moan in the rocks and weep in the grasses.

Spirits inhabit
The darkness that lightens, the darkness that darkens,
The quivering tree, the murmuring wood,
The water that runs and the water that sleeps:
Spirits much stronger than we,
The breathing of the dead who are not really dead,
Of the dead who are not really gone,
Of the dead now no more in the earth.

Listen to Things
More often than Beings
Hear the voice of fire,
Hear the voice of water.
Listen to the wind,
To the bush that is sobbing:
This is the ancestors, breathing.

i will

"I will nurse this autumn carefully,
treat its brittleness gently,
smooth its crumbling edges, its weeping afternoons.

I will rise early and go to it,
wrap it in a soft cloth
and watch its breathing.

I will nurture this autumn knowing
it is myself
in a pure and golden form,
and that childlike
soft words will be brought bubbling up
to be recorded in the patterns of leaves
and the low fog coming across the bay.

I will accept this death
and be content with its coming and watch
its coming
and speak of its coming in slow poems
until at last
there will be no more words,
you will hear only the sound of rain as you sleep."

-Wendy Smyer Yu (found in Life Prayers, p. 347, edited by Elizabeth Roberts & Elias Amidon)

a poem in response to "words"

i was moved and i accepted Susan's invitation, creating this poem:

see my tender grief break
here
in a red and yellow
autumn house

let hope rise after waiting

wake early
gently
to wind music
singing the ancient hymn

taste sweet joy
hungry, aflame heart
meet warm love
cold sky darkness

there is enough

fly light
flow like liquid blue
journey with open arms
go empty

aUtuMn inTentIoNs

these are my autumn intentions:
*live in aligned partnership with autumn and her energies. allow for her winds, her crisp*ness (invigorating and sparkly), her releasing (of leaves), her transformation, her harvest, her astonishing beauty...
*be at home & create home (in my mind, heart, body, nest and work)
*be & create cozy
*be gentle & gentler still with me
*make art
*bake
*light candles
*build my spiritual direction/spiritual guidance practice
*build creative community
*drink cups of tea
*eat slices of pumpkin pie
*practice yoga
*pray
*worship
*nourish my body (monthly massage appointments), mind (delicious & inspiring reading; art viewing; dvd watching...) and spirit (listening for god's whispers and for the feel of her hand in my hand or on my back, gently guiding)
*take walks
*rest, ground, heal
*bake
*VOTE!
*celebrate the extraordinary ordinary: the simplicity of a falling leaf; the unexpectedly good happening; the washing of dishes
*make & have dates with friends: tea dates; lunch dates; dinner dates; creative dates; phone dates
*travel to the lake and to portland, maine

what are your autumn intentions?

today's grat*nour: a poem, discovered here.

Instructions

Give up the world; give up self; finally, give up God.
Find god in rhododendrons and rocks,
passers-by, your cat.
Pare your beliefs, your absolutes.
Make it simple; make it clean.
No carry-on luggage allowed.
Examine all you have
with a loving and critical eye, then
throw away some more.
Repeat. Repeat.
Keep this and only this:
what your heart beats loudly for
what feels heavy and full in your gut.
There will only be one or two
things you will keep,
and they will fit lightly
in your pocket.

-Sheri Hostetler, A Cappella: Mennonite Voices in Poetry

treasuring...

*a black & white calla lily "impromptu postcard" from my "lady friends in Maine"
*a fun "4 things about me" e-mail exchange with my soulsister s., my oldest friend (e.g., 4 jobs i have had in my life; 4 movies i would watch over and over; 4 places i've lived; 4 favorite foods); perhaps i will share these bits in another post...
*planning a late june/early july beach reunion with peeps who are family; celebrating nearly 11 years of livin' & knowin' & lovin' one another!
*the dear diary stories, marta writes
*a cup of heaven rooibos tea in my favorite mug, which by the way was found on the sale table at one of my favorite shops
*writing
*The Ganesh Mantra: Om Gam Ganapataye Namah; a mantra known to remove obstacles, inner and outer, along the path. thank you, beautiful t., for sharing this mantra at the perfect/divine time!
*the library
*avocados & grape tomatoes
*chocolate chip + walnut cookie dough
*therapy
*the color yellow; the color of sunshine and ripe bananas
*these words from The Persistence of Yellow by Monique Duval, #317: "Everything melted, rained, unraveled, became, grew wings, attempted flight, flopped, tried again, succeeded. Just another day."
*these words from Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert: "I remember her taking me by the shoulders and looking me in the eye with a calm smile and saying simply, 'Tell the truth, tell the truth, tell the truth'" (p. 94).
*hope
*imagining
*creating
*grace before meals
*learning & practicing living the poem, "The Journey", by Mary Oliver: "One day you finally knew/what you had to do, and began,/though the voices around you/kept shouting/their bad advice-/though the whole house/began to tremble/and you felt the old tug/at your ankles./'Mend my life!'/each voice cried./But you didn't stop./You knew what you had to do,/though the wind pried/with its stiff fingers/at the very foundations,/though their melancholy/was terrible./It was already late/enough, and a wild night,/and the road full of fallen/branches and stones./But little by little,/as you left their voices behind,/the stars began to burn/through the sheets of clouds,/and there was a new voice/which you slowly/recognized as your own,/that kept you company/as you strode deeper and deeper/into the world,/determined to do/the only thing you could do-/determined to save/the only life you could save."

what are you treasuring?

gesture

Gesture

I
put

my
arms
around

the
sun
and

kissed
her
forehead

gently

-by Zoe Peterssen from Whispers from Nature (part 2), Oxford, 1993

who or what are you wrapping your arms around today and kissing gently?